Thursday, March 24, 2016

Happy Easter and Goodbye Lent!

Finally it's all coming to a close; Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, Valentines, Mardi Gras, Lent, and now Easter coming up this Sunday. I don't know about you but I'm so exhausted I can't even think straight.

However, from here on out it's pretty much smooth sailing throughout the spring and summer months with time to enjoy our friends, family and vacations at leisure - until it all starts up again in autumn.

Of course, in my world we're still dealing with the spring social season and the tedious fund raisers involved, not to mention a few insanely boring high society weddings. But this will be over soon enough - much shorter than the fall social season intertwining with all the holidays.

I know rich people are as anxious for some free time as I am. They honestly work their butts off with no expense spared during the holidays to keep themselves on top of high society and their reputations and fortunes intact.

Time now for a little rest!

If you did Lent this year, I know you're relieved it's over and hope you're satisfied with the efforts. Personally, I think I did pretty well this time around. There was the annual contribution to the poor box at the local Diocese, and I backed off gin martinis in favor of a glass (or two) of Burgundy each evening, which I've heard from reliable sources is a favorite at the Vatican. Surely that counts.

I also shunned left-over caviar from huge galas and whopping cocktail parties. But since my employer has very few lavish events after the divorce, I suspect this won't count at all - if not a big thumbs down from the Lent police.

As the Vatican would have it, we're still in the infrequent and unusual Holy Year of Mercy which I warned about a few months backs. But it's nothing at all like giving up things for Lent! Or trying to keep up with ill-advised New Years's resolutions. So don't even worry about it.

Now it's time for all of us (rich, poor or struggling in between) to relax, unwind, and enjoy the pleasures of spring and summer, don't you think? I just can't wait for family gatherings and cookouts on the Fourth of July, poor as we all might be! But richer in family ties and love than what I see going on around here.

Happy Easter and spring to all! And as always, thanks for stopping by this evening,

Andrew
  

Tuesday, March 15, 2016

"Beware the Ides!"

Today is another "Super Tuesday" in the endless American presidential election.

By coincidence it's also the day in 44 BC when Julius Caesar was murdered.

According to Shakespeare, it was a  haruspex soothsayer by the name of Spurinna who first warned Caesar about the plot to kill him.

On his way to the senate that day on March 15, he passed her in the street and somewhat mockingly said, "The Ides have come."

To which she quietly replied, "But not over."

On that very day a group of dysfunctional senators, in a conspiracy led by Gaius Cassius Longinus and his brother-in-law Marcus Junius Brutus, slowly and deliberately stabbed Julius Caesar to death.

This reckless event brought an end to the troubled and fragile Roman Republic, eventually ushering in the rapacious and cruel Roman Empire.

Beware the Ides, indeed.

Politics can be ever so tricky.

Andrew

Thursday, March 10, 2016

The Weekday Trollop!

You know, I didn't actually start out to write a trilogy about all the women tramping in and out this house, but there's some recent developments I thought I should mention. (This could very well be considered gossip in some circles. But who cares? Gossip to some might be vital information to others, right?)

Since this affair began I've been wondering two things about this weekday trollop. Why does she only come here on Wednesdays and Thursdays? And why do they always order pizza or Chinese delivery for dinner, and never go out in public together?

As to the first question, my confidant at the office told me she's found out that the weekday lady has a long-standing affair with another prominent gentleman here in the Hampton's on Mondays and Tuesdays of each week.

Well, okay. And the answer to that question entirely explains the second question - obviously NONE of these people want to bump into each other out in public and cause a scene. I had suspected something like this all along, but in my naivety assumed she was married and didn't want to be exposed. Hardly did I imagine she's a professional mistress with more than one client in town. Good God!

But the big news tonight is that the usual weekend girlfriend, who we more-or-less like and get along with, has found out about all this whole sordid mess. She came here early this week, packed up all her clothes, shoes, makeup and toiletries, and moved out! I wasn't sure how she found out, but now I think I've figured that out too.

Our pizza delivery girl is a huge source of dependable gossip. She knows everything going on in the community (especially who's car is parked in who's driveway overnight) and shares it all with the house staff all over town. I described her more fully in a post entitled "Do Rich People Order Pizza" some while back.

In any case, when my employer and the trollop ordered pizza on Wednesday last week our charming delivery girl told me the weekend girlfriend had called her up and pumped for information. So I guess that's the weak link right there. (Although gossip from the house staff sometimes trickles up to their employers if they're own confidential terms, and the weekend gal could have found out from other sources among the friends she's made within the community. Who can know?)

My confidant also told me today that our employer has already cancelled the weekend girlfriend's American Express card - so I guess she's gone for good.

It's sad in some ways. I hate to see the Mister left alone on the weekends. On the other hand, it's of his own making, isn't it? In the back of my mind I have a feeling this might be a power play for the weekend girlfriend - marriage or nothing - although I have no evidence to support that. When she left with all her stuff she gave me a big tearful hug, and was seemingly and genuinely hurt.

So now it's just us - the house staff, groundskeepers, the Mister and the dogs - dealing with the weekday professional and whatever new concubine comes next to close the weekend gap. As I've mentioned before, the Mister is close to a thousand years old now, while these young chicks he's running in and out of here are only in their fifties or early sixties - if that gives a clearer picture.

I'm so exhausted and appalled I can't even think straight, and don't know which way to turn from one day to the next. But just in case I need to jump out of here on short notice, I'm already cleaning out my files and updating the resume.

I hope this absurdity hasn't exhausted you too and bored you to death!

As always, thanks for dropping in this evening,
Andrew